Grief has exposed to me some of the most horrific of pain and emotion. Many of which I never even knew existed and honestly never wish I had to learnt them, feel them or experience. I had no choice in that though. Only to work through them and learn how to understand and let go.
There are still quite a few things I have not been able to move through or let go yet. I know it takes a long time, and I'm not sure when or how I will work through it. I just keep trying to move through each day with as much grace and strength I can muster. Sometimes I'm successful, other days not so much.
I feel the #1 problem I'm having with releasing is forgiveness.
Forgiving myself.
Others who treated me so poorly in my darkest days.
People who abandoned me.
People involved in her death.
Places that contributed to the demise of her life.
Forgiveness has got to be the toughest.
And then there is trust.
Maybe someday when I can forgive, I will be able to trust again.
Trust in myself again.
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