* Your support system and people in your life during grief can make or break you. The things people say, do, and how they react to your grief can either put you in a better place (empathy) or a very very dark dismal place.
* You have zero control over grief. It's like trying to stop a tsunami from destroying an entire island. You can't. When grief comes on, it comes on. Sometimes with warning, many times without. It can leave you curled in a ball in your closet sobbing, clinging to any piece of what you have of them, or walking around under a dark cloud for days. This is where a good support system comes in. Or a good closet and a box of tissues.
* crying helps, a lot.
* not everyone gets a rainbow after the storm.
* grief support groups will no longer fit after so long. Especially if your not in the rainbow group.
* And may actually hinder more then help.
* Forgiveness is one of the hardest steps in grief. Forgiving yourself especially.
*Take your time. Grief isn't a race, it's a multi-athalon that goes for the rest of your life. The obsticles change, some are easier then others. After so long you get more stamina, but there will always be times you are just beat and tired.
* the sun can shine, even in the rain.
I will always love her and she will always be missed.
God bless you all on this road. Keep loving. It's ok.
Merry Christmas to you all, and to all of your beautiful babies. May they always be remembered.
